Dr. Shirley Glass

Workshops, Seminars
and Scheduled Appearances

New Hampshire Psychological Association, Inc.
9:00 AM - 4:00 PM
Portsmouth, NH

Not Just Friends: The New Crisis of Infidelity

Shirley P. Glass, Ph.D., ABPP


The new crisis of infidelity is that more marriages are being threatened by collegial relationships and friendships that slowly and insidiously turn into love affairs. People who are not intentionally seeking thrills are unwittingly forming deep and passionate connections before realizing that they've crossed the line between platonic friendship and romantic love. This workshop provides a trauma recovery model after revelation of infidelity which integrates clinical experience, empirical research, and the post-traumatic literature. The initial phase of recovery establishes safety, fosters hope and goodwill, and manages post-traumatic reactions such as hypervigilance, flashbacks, and hyperarousal. This workshop will also present the most recent research and proven clinical approaches for handling the obsessive need for details. A guiding image is to reverse the walls and windows in the extramarital triangle with the spouse inside and the affair partner outside as the disclosure process is shifted from an adversarial inquisition to an empathic process of mutual understanding.

Educational Objectives

1. Differentiate between platonic friendships and extramarital emotional involvement.

2. Identify, validate, and manage post-traumatic reactions in betrayed partners.

3. Help couples reverse walls and windows in extramarital triangles to create safety and establish appropriate boundaries.

4. Understand the role of equity in marriages and in affairs.

5. Use the content of disclosure to change the process from a truth seeking inquisition to an empathic search for meaning.

6. Develop clinical approaches to infidelity that are consistent with research findings.

© Dr. Shirley Glass